36-degree Curve

I received a dispiriting diagnosis today. The pain in my side is related to scoliosis, it's not going to get any better and there's not much I can do about it.

As background, I was diagnosed with scoliosis at a young age. I inherited it from my mother. Her curve is very pronounced. In her 40s, she had an operation that stiffened her back by screwing her spine to three steel rod implants. Until I reached adolescence I wore a special orthopedic brace every night in the hopes of arresting my curve so that it wouldn't get as bad as my mother's.

Scoliosis isn't that bad, as far as congenital deformities go. It's pretty common for women. It never slowed my mother down, before or after her operation. As far as my spine, no one can tell in public; I compensate with posture.

On the other hand, I do hate having it. I'm already tall, but without the scoliosis, I'd be at least an inch taller. The brace I used to have to wear looked horrific. My stepfather called it "The Iron Maiden". It encased my hips and waist in thick, rigid plastic, then steel rods in the front and back connected the hips to a steel core foam-wrapped collar. When it was hot, the plastic was sweaty; when it was cold the exposed steel would give me nasty chills. I stoically climbed into it and strapped it on almost every night for five years. I was very grateful I didn't have to wear it during the day.

I wish we'd thought to save my records and remember my final spinal curve number from when I was a teenager. I think it's gotten worse in the last few years.

In the last six months I've noticed a stabbing pain in my side that comes and goes. It's not like a typical backache. I've just determined it's a scoliosis-related problem. The side-to-side curve of my spine is causing the ribs on the right side to spread apart too much, and the muscle between some of the ribs is complaining.

It also turns out there's nothing I can do about it. It got really bad for a while because of all the coughing I was doing when I had the long cold. Taking a deep breath felt like someone was punching me in the chest. Now it seems to be going away, but if I exercise (a rare occurrence) it comes back.

The doctor did say that exercising more will eventually help. I absolutely need to start doing flexibility training on a regular basis. If that doesn't help things, I can try targeted physical therapy. I'll go back next year and see if my curve gets any worse. If it gets much past 40 degrees, I'll probably need surgery. It's a depressing prospect. I really don't want to live with this pain for the rest of my life. And even though I can do things to manage the pain, there's absolutely nothing that can be done about the curve. Whether it stays the same or gets worse is all encoded in my genes.

On the bright side, I have very good health in other areas. And I can carry Sunny around on piggyback, which my husband can't do! My mother has lived with worse, so I guess I'll just have to learn to have a good attitude about this.